My grandmother passed away today. I cried for the first time in a long time. I am lucky though: I got the chance to know my grandma.

Her name was Maria (and she is part of the reason behind my daughter’s name). She was such an incredible woman. Not only was she a hard working person (she’d wake up at 5am and turn in at 10pm), but she never complained about the hand that life dealt her. She was born in the countryside, and she lived all her life at the top of the Harghita mountains. She raised four children (including my mother), and sadly she had to bury her husband and her eldest son.

She was strong and fit. She rode her bicycle till well in her 70s. She wouldn’t miss Sunday mass even if she had to battle a blizzard. She was respected and obeyed by the entire family. She never raised her voice, nor did she ever need to punish anyone. She knew how to have fun, too. When we least expected it she’d prank the kids, or she’s crack a joke.

Before emigrating to New Zealand, the very last trip I took was to go and see her. It was a 12 hour journey, and although I only spent a few days with her, I never regretted it. That was not the last time I saw her, though. I went back in 2011 and, for the first time in my life, I was able to have a grown-up conversation with her. She told me about what our family went through during the Second World War, she told me about how my grandfather lived and died, she gave me life advice, and she answered all my questions. I loved her more that day then I had my entire life. I had always known she was an incredible woman, but until that day I had never quite understood why everyone looked up to her the way they did.

My grandmother played a big part in my life. When I was nine years old and I ran away from home, I ran to her. When I had to decide what to do when I had a week to spend in Romania, I went to see her. When I close my eyes and think of my childhood, I remember spending time with her, learning how to herd the sheep, milk the cows, work the hay…

I’m lucky because I have so many memories with her. But there will not be any new ones and this is hard to come to terms with. Goodbye, Grandma, rest in peace, and thank you for everything you gave me.